Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
