evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
