i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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