I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
