Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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