dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
he fucked my hip out of place.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
