he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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