I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
