I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
