Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
