Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
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