...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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