The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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