On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
