Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
