lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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