ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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