yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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