i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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