Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
