Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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