she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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