Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I think I won the penis lottery.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize