Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
