I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
