She announced her abortion via fbk
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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