Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
