All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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