It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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