come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
