how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize