I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize