i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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