Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
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