is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
