Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
