i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
This is classic penis vs brain.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
