Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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