I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
