I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
