Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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