so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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