Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
