The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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