There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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