i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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