i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize