hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
