I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
So gin and wine won't be happening again
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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