Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
